The events as they occured...
Msngr. Brendan: I come on behalf of Lord John the Fat of Woodleaf.
Me: Proceed.
Brendan: <<clears throat>> My lord humbly requests that you relinquish the European chocolate you horde.
Me: I hardly consider the request humble.
Brendan: Well there's more. If you decline, he shall be forced to...to annoy the crap out of you. I believe those were his words, yes.
Me: I see...
Brendan: <<Waits>>
Me: Tell my brother - absolutely fucking not.
Brendan: <<bows>> Yes, your Excellency. <<leaves>>
Me: <<returns to work>>
Brendan: <<pops his head back in>> You wouldn't happen to be at all French?
Me: No, not at all.
Brendan: Dammit. <<turns>><<audibly whispers to Scott>> He won't give up easily.
Brendan & Scott: <<leave>><<can be heard calling through the house>> Lord John! We bear ill news...he's not French!
Msngr. Brendan: I come on behalf of Lord John the Fat of Woodleaf.
Me: Proceed.
Brendan: <<clears throat>> My lord humbly requests that you relinquish the European chocolate you horde.
Me: I hardly consider the request humble.
Brendan: Well there's more. If you decline, he shall be forced to...to annoy the crap out of you. I believe those were his words, yes.
Me: I see...
Brendan: <<Waits>>
Me: Tell my brother - absolutely fucking not.
Brendan: <<bows>> Yes, your Excellency. <<leaves>>
Me: <<returns to work>>
Brendan: <<pops his head back in>> You wouldn't happen to be at all French?
Me: No, not at all.
Brendan: Dammit. <<turns>><<audibly whispers to Scott>> He won't give up easily.
Brendan & Scott: <<leave>><<can be heard calling through the house>> Lord John! We bear ill news...he's not French!
Brendan returns minutes later.
Brendan: Lord John says that if you do not comply to his humble request, he shall commence biological experiments on her Magesty the Queen Gypsy Desirée Bomont III.
Me: Are you kidding me?
Brendan: I'm afraid not, your Highness. The man is quite mad.
Me: Hypothetically - if I were to give each one of you a small morsel of German triple-layered chocolate, this delectable culinary confection, would you leave me alone forevermore?
Brendan: Forevermore is an awfully long time, your -
Me: ANSWER, FOOL!
Brendan: <<hesitates>> My lord requires a 'small half', as he so eloquently put it.
Me: Ha! A 'small half'. Oh yes, such a way with words. Tell my brother he speaks nonesense and I shall be forever disinclined to aquiesce to his request, however humble you deem it.
Brendan: <<pauses>> You wouldn't happen to be at all Scottish or Irish...?
Me: Yes, I would. Both.
Scott: <<whispers>> Joy. All we have to do is get him drunk.
Brendan: Thus, you have sealed the Queen's fate. <<bows>> Good day, your Awesomeness.
Me: Are you kidding me?
Brendan: I'm afraid not, your Highness. The man is quite mad.
Me: Hypothetically - if I were to give each one of you a small morsel of German triple-layered chocolate, this delectable culinary confection, would you leave me alone forevermore?
Brendan: Forevermore is an awfully long time, your -
Me: ANSWER, FOOL!
Brendan: <<hesitates>> My lord requires a 'small half', as he so eloquently put it.
Me: Ha! A 'small half'. Oh yes, such a way with words. Tell my brother he speaks nonesense and I shall be forever disinclined to aquiesce to his request, however humble you deem it.
Brendan: <<pauses>> You wouldn't happen to be at all Scottish or Irish...?
Me: Yes, I would. Both.
Scott: <<whispers>> Joy. All we have to do is get him drunk.
Brendan: Thus, you have sealed the Queen's fate. <<bows>> Good day, your Awesomeness.